Getting into the Groove - My Lockdown Routine (and how it stops me going insane)

First of all, welcome to my new blog. Actually it's just the old blog with a different name but it feels like a brand new venture. I had already decided to open this up to more than just film reviews (although they will still remain a feature when the cinema finally opens back up) but thought the change in title would make it more obvious.

We are now in the midst of week 6 of lockdown with no clear indication of when it will eventually start to drift back to normality. It's hard. I have had several wobbles; times when I've wanted to curl up into a ball and just cry. I'm lucky in that my hubby and daughter have been here to get me through any dark moments. And the rest of the time I find that if I have a structure, it takes my mind off of the scary moments and keeps me focused. I'm not going to take you through my day hour by hour, that's just dull and not helpful to everyone as we all have our own timetable. But, I will share my lockdown non-negotiables, the things I always include to keep me sane (or at least a manageable level of insanity)

Post workout glow

Exercise
This is a must for me! I always feel like I've achieved something if I workout. It doesn't have to be a huge sweat-fest, but it has to be at least 30 minutes where I move my body and get my heart rate up. I just use whatever I have available which includes some kettlebells, resistance bands, my old Wii Fit step and an old exercise bike. Plus I always end my workout with 10 minutes of yoga. I started to include this regularly as I find that the stretching helps my muscles (so important at my age) and it helps with calming my brain before I start my day... namaste.

Always love a cuppa - a present from my dad and his wife

Tea
I know a lot of coffee drinkers, and I sometimes envy the choice they have when they saunter into a Starbucks or Costa and have an array of tastes and flavours to pick from. But I tried coffee once, and it certainly didn't agree with me. So that just leaves me with hot chocolate and my trusted cuppa.
Tea is life, and I'm not exaggerating. It's the thing that wakes me in the morning, and soothes me to sleep at night (decaffeinated of course). I am a habitual early riser (even at the weekends I'm normally up before others) so my first cup is almost always enjoyed by myself, with no one around to disturb me. This is my 'me' time and I bloody love it. That isn't to say I don't like my family, but there is something special about that time in the morning where I can sit in silence, maybe read a little, or listen to my morning motivation podcast and savour my caffeine in peace. I hesitate to think what would happen if this part of my day ever changes 😧

We like to get creative at work

Walk
As soon as 5pm ticks around, my laptop goes off. That might not seem unusual, however as a teacher, it's almost unheard of. But, as people keep saying, this is an unprecedented time and as this madness continues, so will my 5 o'clock sign off. And that leads me to my next must-do, my daily walk.
At the beginning of the lockdown, I would only go for a walk every few days, just when I wasn't using weights to workout. But as days turned to weeks, I started to get a bit of cabin fever and that was very unsettling. Hubby suggested that maybe I should go for a walk after work (which means he was cooking dinner - bonus). So, for the last 2 weeks, I have finished work, grabbed my trainers and gone out into the 'fresh' air. My daughter has also started to join me on these little strolls. Where I adore my alone time in the morning, I equally love this mother daughter time in the late afternoon. I barely see her as she does all her school work and has her chill time in her room, so this is our time to catch up and check how we are both doing. Different scenery helps me, even if it is just for half an hour a day.

I own an Amazon tablet but sometimes there is nothing better than a traditional book
 

Reading

This is something that I tried to do regularly pre Covid-19, lockdown has just given me more opportunities to get into a good book or article. And as much as I love a good film or TV series, I sometimes need to use my own imagination for a while and that is where reading is perfect. I vary what I read; autobiographies, fitness articles, historical novels, satirical political magazines, etc. I currently use my lunchtime for 20-30 minutes of uninterrupted book time. I need this time as I find it a very calming activity and one that stops my brain from over thinking about other stuff.

There are other elements to my lockdown routine but at the moment the list above are the main things that get me through, that make each day a little more bearable. Feel free to comment if there is anything that is getting you through lockdown or maybe give some of these things a go if you're not already.

If weight is just a number, why does it bother me so much?

As the blurb on my blog informs anyone who chances upon my printed thoughts, I am approaching 40. In fact I'm on the final stretch to the big day - 4 months and one week to go 👍. This does not bother me. In fact I am embracing the impending decade change with excitement. I guess it's because this time in my life is the most stable, and the most enjoyable I've experienced for a long, long time. Getting older isn't as scary as I thought it would be. I've even decided to start growing out my grey hair (well, being in quarantine has certainly helped that decision).
So if finally crossing over into my 5th decade isn't a problem, you'd think that I'm probably one of those annoying people who have their life together. ❌ WRONG! While some areas of my life could be described as together (all be it with sellotape, pritt-stick and a large dollop of hope) other parts are a complete mess. Top of the 'what the hell is going on' list is something I think a lot of people can relate to... my weight.

                                               

I have a love/hate relationship with my weight right now which is probably being emphasised by the current situation. I started the quarantine determined not to fall victim to boredom snacking, then I got it into my head that I could actually leave the flat as a better, much improved version of the one that went into lock-down.

Now, five weeks in and I am constantly beating myself up because I have failed to lose more than a pound. Actually, that's not quite true. I have dipped below 10 stone but then found myself bouncing right back up again. Days later, the number would decrease and I was on my journey again. Until the number went up and... I think you get the idea. Weight loss is never linear, I know that, unfortunately that hasn't made me think any more rationally. This has been creating a vicious cycle that I am finally starting to see isn't helping my mental health.

Pregnant with Sophie at 7 and 8 months

I have never been extremely overweight. I was very lucky that I didn't put on loads of weight when I was pregnant. However, I did go up to a size 14 which for me, an ex-swimmer, ex-captain of the netball team, fairly active person up until the month I gave birth, was not comfortable. It took many years but eventually I went from 12 stone to 9 and a half stone.

All well and good, but it never lasted. I didn't go back up to my biggest weight, but I did yo-yo for a bit. I would have patches of regular activity (I trained for and completed a Swimathon, cycled to and from work for over a year) and then I would have times when I could not be bothered. Whether I used my studying or health issues, there was an excuse I could fall back on until I was fed up enough to go again.

Very sophisticated for a lass from Dag'nam!

My last surge was in the lead up to my wedding. Like most brides, I wanted to look my best on the big day so I was on the workout and healthy eating trail once again. I love my photos and loved the way I looked on the day (which is also in part thanks to my excellent photographer and awesome hair and makeup lady).

As is the way, after the wedding, I wasn't as 'strict' and the weight went slowly up. By the time 2019 came to the home straight, I was 10 pounds heavier.

Dressed up to see Cher at the O2 (Oct' 2019) (size 10 - just)

Which brings me to now. As I've said before (and I might mention again) 40 is coming up and I decided that this was the birthday where I wanted to make a fuss. Then Covid-19 happened to the world and priorities changed. Plans can be rearranged, people's health cannot. Working from home became the new norm and the outside world almost became a forbidden zone.

With all these changes, you'd think that I would adapt with them. Apparently not. In my head I am still on the track to my best self and to hell with the fact that things are not normal right now. So any deviations from that plan put me in a funk and I started to overthink EVERYTHING. Why am I not losing pounds every week? Why do I not have a butt of steel already? Why can't I just eat chocolate and drink wine, and still have a six-pack? 

2011 - size 12/14

I'm very careful not to mention weight in front of my daughter. I make sure I emphasise exercise and diet for health and strength, but I'm sure she senses my foul mood when I've found out that the scales have failed to shift, or worse, gone in the 'wrong' direction.

I have a horrible habit of weighing myself every morning. I don't know why, or what I expect to happen. I tried to put my scales away. That lasted for a week before they found their way back into the bathroom and available for my daily torture. This is something that I know I need to get away from asap.

I also need to stop being hard on myself. I am still getting up at 6am and working out. I have had to adapt my routine as three weeks into lockdown, my right knee started to swell and I had to rest it (which I obviously hated). Now it's mostly bodyweights with some yoga. 

Then my walks have also changed. My daughter has started to join me out and about, so instead of sticking in earphones and walking with purpose, we enjoy the outdoors and chat. This is mother daughter time and I have been enjoying it immensely - much more important that trying to burn a few extra calories.

I don't want to be skinny, I want to be me, just a really healthy (read - sexy?) me. I have to try and disassociate the numbers on a scale with how I look and feel. I know that won't be easy and I'm not going to kid myself that I can just stop thinking about losing pounds. But I also know there are other concerns in the world and it is more important to worry about my mental well-being rather than the size of my stomach. 

Film Day 2020 (Easter Edition)

It has now become a twice annual tradition in this household to have a proper film day. That's a day where we sit around in PJs, eat junk food and watch as many films as we can fit in.

Normally this would occur around the Easter and Christmas holidays, time when we spend the majority of our days going out and about, so it would be a nice change of pace to stay home and do nothing but watch movies. However, Covid-19 has made staying in the only option for families this Easter time so it might seem that our planned film day isn't as unusual as it has previously sounded to others. But, it's our tradition, so lockdown or no lockdown, it's going ahead.

Our family film day has a process. For one, we start to narrow down our options weeks in advance. This isn't because we are particularly organised, but more for the fact that there are so many films we want to watch, and we are notorious for spending an unnecessarily stupid amount of time trying to agree, that if it doesn't get decided on before the day, it isn't happening.
Luckily, we had made most of the decisions beforehand as, let's face it, there was nothing else better to do anyway.

We started just before 10am with our blockbuster of the day, Aquaman. Yes, I know. As a family of geeks, it is almost shameful to admit that we had still not seen it, even after Sophie got to cuddle up to Mr Momoa at our most recent Comic-Con outing. But, that was the past as at 9.45(ish)am yesterday, we finally watched it. 
Now this blog-post isn't a review; most of the films we watch are ones which managed to pass us by at the cinema for some inexplicable reason, so I won't be running through my usual thoughts and opinions on each flick. However, it was a pretty decent start to film day, my only gripe being who on earth thought that soundtrack was a good idea?

Second up, The Last Samurai. Hubby and myself had watched this together some years ago, but we haven't revisited it since, which is bizarre when you consider my love for all things Japanese, especially historically. But, this seemed as good a time as any for a second viewing and also a good time to introduce it to our daughter. 
I forgot how much I loved the film. Good story, great actors, and some of the visuals could be ripped right off the screen and stuck in an art gallery; stunning. 
One thing I did have to do was shut up while we watched. You see, in the time between our previous and recent viewing, I had read a lot about Samurai history, including about the man labelled as the actual last samurai, Saigo Takamori. I have become fascinated with him as a person, including planning to have him inked onto my left arm. So, it was for the love of my family that I was forced to stop commenting on how 'it was never like that' and just enjoy the film, which I did.

Third film of the day was Reservoir Dogs. There was a lot riding on this one. My poor 14 year old daughter has been bombarded, over time, with my love of Tarantino. Every time a new film is released, I go into fan girl mode. Another significant fact is that I first saw Reservoir Dogs at the age of 14, when I made myself up and walked into the cinema (with a much older boyfriend at the time) having no clue how this small film would change my view on movies. So, with my child being of that age (but thankfully with a better sense of relationships than her mother), it seemed a good time to share. 
And, 98 minutes later, I looked expectantly at my child to gauge her reaction to this magnificent film. She looked me in the eyes and said "Meh."
😲
It's OK, my heart is not really broken. I never really watched all the films that Sophie has done up until this point so compared to some of the things she has seen, it must have seemed quite dull. Hubby thinks she'll perk up a bit with Pulp Fiction, but maybe I'm just going to have to face facts, not everyone loves Tarantino (even if they do have half of my genetics).

It seemed a little unfair for Sophie to suffer through a film she didn't like, so choice number 4 was hers, and what a choice; Avengement. Scott Adkins as a man out for revenge 👍 
Some proper dodgy EastEnd accents and some violent set pieces; Sophie loved it. Little fact, hubby and I went to see this movie at the cinema. It was a one off showing in Stratford that had the man himself, Mr Adkins in attendance. I was also sitting only a few metres away from Mr Jean-Paul Ly but that's another story.

And for the last film of the night (after a quick dinner break) we decided to watch See No Evil, Hear No Evil (we always like to put on a comedy as part of our film days). I haven't seen this film in years. Has it stood the test of decades? Mostly. There were a couple of times that I cringed inwardly but nothing that completely spoiled it for me. And Sophie found it extremely entertaining (hubby loves this movie anyway so it was always going to be a winner for him) so I was happy that we managed to end the evening on a good note.

Thus, at 8.30(ish)pm, film day was over and done with. 

And what was the point of this post. There are no reviews to speak of, and there is no lesson to learn in all this. The only thing I wish to share is that days like these make me extremely happy. Sharing films with the hubby, both old and new, as well as introducing Sophie to new motion picture experiences, that's my jam. The husband wishes to make the next film day themed, picking a certain actor or genre to stick to, but I like the chaos and randomness that we sometimes achieve through our film choices. Who will get their way? I guess we'll find out at Christmas.

Guess Who's Back?

It has been a while, years in fact. What the hell has been happening during that time?
Well, after taking a teaching job in 2015, I started my PGCE which took 2 years to complete (whilst also working a full timetable - lots of fun).
Then last year, I managed to get myself promoted as a Teaching and Learning Coach - oooo, get me!

I've still been going to the cinema and watching as many films as I could mentally cram in, but I just didn't have the time to write about them. To air my views about the latest movies, as well as sharing my thoughts on moving pictures from the past, there just wasn't the time to squeeze that in among the hours of planning, marking, report writing, etc. Or that's what I told myself.

But times, they are a-changing. The current situation has meant that the outdoors is no longer accessible and we have to find new things to do to keep our brains from exploding with utter boredom and worry.
The hubby (oh yeah, I did a thing) has encouraged me to get back to writing this blog. Yes, the cinema is a no-go area, but with Netflix, Prime, Disney +, etc. there are still plenty of of things to watch and absorb. So here I am, back to something that brought me so much joy (and a bit of agonizing over vocabulary choice and punctuation placement) to share my thoughts with... well, whoever wants to read this.

Obviously, with the blog being (currently) confined to indoor entertainment, there may be some new topics of conversation, but everything will be from the mind of this slightly eccentric, now closer to forty, film loving, blogger.